trying to be the General Manager of the Universe?

I laughed my head off the first time I heard that term. One of my favorite coaches from years ago asked me... 

"Are you trying to be the General Manager of the Universe?" 

Urmmmm...ya. I was. 

And pretty frequently, too! 

Don't know if you know this or not but...it's not possible to be the General Manager of the Universe. 🤣

Especially not when you have a crazy illness like Long Covid or ME/CFS/FM. In fact, chronic illnesses are one of the most amazing ways of showing us that we DO have to hand it over. That we ultimately don't have control over everything. 

Sure...we still take inspired action. We do the research, we stay abreast of the latest information, we attend classes and take courses that will assist us in healing and dealing. 

But we do have to let go of trying to figure it all out and let go of trying to FIX everything all the time because 1. it's exhausting (and we're already exhausted!!) and 2. ultimately...we can't MAKE it happen!

Also, trying to control or manage everything else in our lives (other than our health) becomes almost impossible. So another added "bonus" of being sick...we get to prioritize. (If you haven't downloaded the Self-Pacing Workbook already, I *highly* recommend it...it will help you prioritize big time.)

For many years now...I've given it up, handed it over, let go of trying to control everything. Let go of trying to control most things, in fact. Sure, I still find myself trying to sometimes. Sometimes I can tell I'm trying too hard to figure it out or to get better physically. But that's part of the fun of all of this...because we get to play a game with ourselves. We get to train our minds...bit by bit...to be our employees, not our boss. And part of that training is...to resign from being (or trying to be) the General Manager of the Universe. 

I challenge you to give it a shot. Even say it out loud..."I resign from the position of General Manager of the Universe!" And hand it over. 

I promise you...the sun is still going to come up in the morning. The flowers are still going to bloom. The trees will continue to grow. And other people will continue to do what they do. And YOU get to do what YOU do. 

Here are some yummy yoga practices to help you hand it over and to enter what I call The Fertile Void. Yin yoga is akin to Restorative Yoga. Both are doable for most with Long Covid and ME/CFS/FM. Just make sure to listen to your body and stop if it's telling you to. 

To determine which Phase you're in, try this quiz:  What Phase of Long Covid Recovery Are You In?

10 min Yin Yoga for Phase I (bedbound and housebound)

45 min Yin Yoga for Phase II and III (if Phase II, stop your practice and take Savasana 15-20 minutes in)

Make sure to let me know how it goes for you in the Comments section!

Big love 🧡

Lorrie


Looking For Valentine's Date Ideas for Quarantine?

Today I am filled with love and gratitude. For YOU. Seriously. It washed over me unexpectedly this morning while I was thinking about what Valentine's gift to send to you. I was feeling a little run down, a little deflated and unsure about what to write and what to send you. A little unsure of myself. I got soft and gooey and loving of myself and my body and my feelings. And then...WHOOSH...love and gratitude. For you. You are the inspiration. So THANK YOU. And please know that my heart is open and sending so much love to you. 

This Shower Yourself with Love Meditation is perfect for Valentine's Day (or any day!). Get comfy either seated or lying down, and get soft and gooey with yourself. Recognizing that YOU are perfect right here. Right now. If you'd like a loving, therapeutic Svaroopa Style classto support yourself along with this meditation, you can try one here

Looking for Valentine's Day date ideas? It's a little...different this year, isn't it? Going out to dinner might not be a possibility. So...here you go! I'm teaching an Online Partner Yoga Classthis Sunday with Be Yoga. Yup, that's Valentine's Day! A dear friend of mine usually teaches it in person with her hubbie and I'm teaching it for her this year with my honey! We've gone every year and we have a blast! And he's not super bendy. Complete beginners are welcome. We always laugh and have a great time. It's a fun way to celebrate Valentine's Day and to connect with your partner. Or you can do the class with a quarantine friend! 2pm eastern US. Sign up HERE

Write "I AM LOVE" in the YouTube comments to let me know you've done this beautiful meditation with us and that you're a part of our community. 

Know that you are loved. You ARE love. 

Big love 💕

Lorrie

PS Don’t forget to try Shower Yourself with Love Meditation and write “I Am Love” in the comments below the video on Youtube so I know you’ve read this email.

PPS 🥰 Join us for a fun Partner Yoga class on Sunday, it's the perfect Valentine's Day Date! 😍

Papa Rivers' Holiday Story With Fox and Mole and Pup

My dad’s holiday story is always a touchstone for me of what the holidays are truly about, but I think we all especially need this story this year because of all that has been happening (wow, what a year!). The message Papa Rivers has so eloquently, creatively and sweetly embodied here is one of connecting with our fellow humans (or animals), regardless of our differences. I hope the story leaves you and your family’s hearts warm and glowing for this holiday season.

Heat up some spiced apple cider, sit down by the fire and get cozy for this holiday treat.

mole for christmas.jpg

The Holiday Story
by Dr. William Rivers, PhD

If you had been watching the road between Mt. Croghan and Thompson Creek on that real cold, windy Christmas Eve several years ago, you would have been blessed with an odd sight. For on that evening, well after dark, you would have seen a little creature all bundled up in a coat, cap, and even little boots walking very quickly in short little steps toward Mt. Croghan. It was Mole. His hands were pushed deep into the pockets of his wool coat. His shoulders were scrunched up so his coat collar would meet his cap, and his chin was tucked way down against his chest. These maneuvers, though they made Mole’s appearance even odder to behold, did help to keep out the cold so that Mole was pretty warm—except when the wind, which was blowing from his back, gusted up. When that happened Mole’s cheeks tingled and he felt cold air coming in around his collar and the bottom of his coat. But Mole did not stop. He just scrunched and tucked and walked a little faster. 

“What a cold Christmas Eve to be out,” muttered Mole to himself as he moved along. “Sure do wish I were back in Fox’s nice warm den drinking hot tea.” Even the memory of Fox’s home and hospitality, now at least a half an hour and a mile behind him, made Mole feel warmer inside despite a fresh and decidedly colder gust of wind. 

Mole did not usually take such long walks alone at night in the winter—especially on Christmas Eve. But there was a good reason for this late night excursion. Way back before Thanksgiving he had agreed to keep all of Squirrel’s Christmas gifts in one of his spare rooms so Squirrel’s very active five children wouldn’t find them. The gifts had been stacked away in his spare bedroom since early December. And to his horror Mole had almost forgotten. He had assured Squirrel that he would be there to help him retrieve the gifts. But since then Fox had invited him to spend Christmas Eve at his house so that Mole could go with them on Pup’s first trip to Antioch. It had been a little over seven months since Fox and Mole had found Pup lying beside Number 9 after being hit by a car and had gotten Evan to help them carry him to Fox’s house so they could set Pup’s broken leg in a cast. Pup still had a bit of a limp, but he could get around just fine and he was quickly catching onto the ways of the “wild” animals. But he hand not yet been to Antioch at Christmas. 

Mole loved going to Antioch at Christmas and he loved the warmth and Christmas smells and cheer he always found at Fox’s. So he went. And it was only in the early evening of Christmas Eve as Mole sat in a deep easy chair beside the fire looking at Fox’s tree with the few, but very carefully wrapped packages underneath that Mole remembered. He was bundled up and out the door almost before Fox could ask what the trouble was. 

Every time he thought of how he almost forgot, Mole scolded himself and felt guilty and cold inside. But when he thought about how happy Squirrel’s children would be—especially the new little orphan squirrel Ashleigh had found and Squirrel and his family had adopted—Mole felt warmer inside. Cold guilt contended with warm satisfaction in Mole’s little breast until the warm won out. “There’s no way I could have completely forgotten,” Mole assured himself. I believe that—don’t you?

Mole was almost there. Just a short stretch of road and he would be in Mt. Croghan. Then a left turn on the north road, a brisk walk up the hill past the church and then down into the next hollow, a right turn on his special little path which crossed the field into the woods at the bottom of the filed and he would be there. As he made his left turn on to the north road, he began to hear sounds like music even over the sound of the wind. Soon he could see that that church was all lit up and the townspeople, at least a good many of them, were at church for a Christmas Eve service. When he got to the church, he paused to listen. The animals who were Mole’s friends had mixed feelings about people. Many of the things people did were not very nice, but a few things they did were quite nice. Mole said to himself, “this is one of the nice things.” Mole had listened before and even peeked in to see just what was going on. Even out in the cold he could easily imagine the warmth and friendship and cheer of the people inside; of the lights on the tree; of the brown paper bags tied with bright ribbon that Grace Gibson had filled with fruit and nuts and candy from her store up Number 9; of how excited and happy the children were as they thought of the goodies the next morning would bring. “They are really quite like us when you get down to the basic things,” Mole thought to himself. He stayed long enough to hear Edit Atkinson at the organ and Mema at the piano start “Silent Night” and then hear the small group bravely begin to sing with Billy Adams’ clear and strong baritone rising above all the other voices. And as they finished with “sleep in heavenly peace” Mole remembered his destination and felt again the cold wind, now in his face. He turned and scurried up the road and on toward his home. 
Even before he got half way across the filed, Mole was sure he could hear Squirrel; he almost thought he could see him squirreling quick, quick back and forth (oh, that’s what squirrels do—they don’t pace back and forth, they squirrel quick, quick back and forth) on that large branch up high in the oak tree where Squirrel and his family lived. But it was after dark and even though the stars were shining bright in a clear sky and even with the glasses Mole wears (the ones Little Lorrie found for him soon after they met years ago) he knew that he couldn’t see Squirrel. Mole did hear him though; and Mole knew what he was doing so it was almost like he could see Squirrel. 

Mole figured that Squirrel was worried and fussing. He was right. Squirrel was really beside himself (and Squirrel can move so quickly that he can almost be beside himself when he wants to. At least that’s the way it looks to my slow eyes). Anyway Squirrel was saying (and saying it very quickly indeed so that you have to read his sentences at least three times as fast as normal, that’s why it’s written in smaller, faster type):

“Where is that Mole? He should have been here long ago. Bet he forgot. Forgot about our gifts. Our gifts in his spare bedroom. What are we gonna do? The kids will be so disappointed. Oh me, oh my. If Mole ever shows up around here again, I’ll give him a piece of my mind. I will; I will.” 

When Mole got to the foot of the oak tree, he looked up, cupped his hands around his mouth, and called out: “Squi—rrrrel. It’s Mo—oooooole.”

Mole had to call out several times before Squirrel heard because he was fussing so. When he did hear, Squirrel said:

“Ah! Ah! Ah! There he is. Just wait. Just wait. Am I gonna give him a piece of my mind! Making me wait and worry like this. Just wait. Just wait. Ah! Ah! Ah!”

And he said this all the way down the tree. And he meant it. But when he got to the ground and was close enough to start his harangue, he could see the worried, sorrowful look on Mole’s face and he could not fuss. He could not. 

“Hi, Mole. Merry Christmas! Good night for a walk.” 

“Gee, Squirrel. I’m sorry. Sorry I’m so late. I was at Fox’s and I almost forgot.”

“No problem. No problem. Just in time. Besides a little anticipation is appropriate at Christmas. Right? Right. Now, let’s go get the gifts. Lots to do. Lots to do. Get your key out. You do have your key, right? Your door is locked. I tried it. Just to make sure your things were safe, you know. They are. Very safe. Very secure. Let’s go. Lots to do. Lots to do.”

You’ve seen it before. No one can be really angry at Mole—at least not for long. And even before they had made their way to Mole’s door, Squirrel had quite forgotten his anxiety and anger. Animals are good at not carrying around their angry stuff. We should be so wise. 

When all the gifts were placed at the foot of the oak so that Squirrel could take them up the tree (Mole couldn’t help him with that task. Moles are diggers, not climbers), Mole asked Squirrel if he were going to Antioch. 

“No. No. No. Too many young ones. Maybe next year. If you are going, better get started. A long walk. A cold night.”

“Yes. But at least the wind is dying down. Merry Christmas to you and your family.”

“Merry Christmas to you too, Mole. And thanks again for your help.” (Did you notice? Squirrel actually slowed down to make sure that Mole heard.)

Mole was lucky. The wind had died down so Mole’s walk back to Fox’s was not that bad. It was cold, but still and the sky was moonless and filled with stars. He was walking fast, but stopped a couple of times to catch his breath and look at the stars. Once when he was about half way down the hill to Thompson’s creek and within a half a mile of Fox’s house and thus quite sure that he would make it back in time for Antioch, Mole stopped and looked up for a long time. Then he began to turn slowly so he could take in all the stars and their patterns. The effect was, Mole thought, wonderful. The stars seemed to take on a movement of their own and to spin in patterns that didn’t match his movement. He began to feel that he was still and the starts were moving. Around and around he turned uttering little “ooooohs” and forgetting completely that he was turning until his body told him he was dizzy and he almost fell down. 

Just as Mole started his little circular dance, a rabbit out foraging for last minute tidbits for his Christmas table came to the edge of the road. He stopped and watched the whole thing and didn’t move until Mole had walked a ways down the road. (Though for the first ten or fifteen yards, it was more wobble than walk. Mole was quite dizzy.) The rabbit moved away shaking his head, snickering, and muttering to himself: “I’ve been down a lot of rabbit holes, but I’ve never seen anything quite like that.”

Within fifteen minutes, Mole was down the hole under the big hickory root—the hole that lead to Fox’s place. He opened the door, quickly closing it behind him so not much cold air would spill in. When he turned back toward the room, he saw Fox sitting in his big overstuffed chair reading a book. Pup was standing (a bit impatiently, Mole thought) with his back to the fire—the warm fire Mole had to leave hours ago when he started his journey. 

“Ah, Mole. Welcome back,” said Fox. “Pup here was wondering if you would get back in time to go to Antioch. I told him that you would for sure and that it would take about fifteen minutes longer. And how long ago was that Pup?” 

“Fifteen minutes. Are you always right, Fox?”

“Not often enough, Pup. Not often enough. Warm your hands and face a bit, Mole, and then we’d best be going.”

Pup chimed in with: “and why don’t you have some hot tea. It wouldn’t take a minute to heat the water on the fire.”

“Oh, thank you, Pup. But that would never do. Not right before going to Antioch.” 

“What is it with this Antioch anyway? You two have not let me eat or drink anything but cold water since breakfast. Why? It doesn’t make sense.”

Fox just smiled and said, “You’ll see. You’ll see.” And as soon as Mole had warmed his hands at the fire, Fox banked the coals and they bundled up and headed out into the cold, clear Christmas Eve air. 

They walked to the road, turned right, crossed Thompson Creek, and started climbing the hill. As soon as they were on the road and could walk side by side, Pup started in again: “What is this Antioch? Why are we going there so late on Christmas Eve? Why wouldn’t you let me eat today? I don’t understand. You two are usually such reasonable creatures.”

Fox grew tired of the questions before they were halfway up the hill. He finally responded, using that firm, authoritatiCopyright 2007, William Riversve voice he uses when he grows impatient: “Pup, you will see when we get there. Our tradition is not to talk on the way there or the way back. You will understand it all on your own. Be patient.” And then Fox patted Pup on the shoulder. 

The pat told Pup that Fox still liked him. Fox’s tone told Pup that he should not say anything else. He didn’t. He wanted to, but he didn’t. 

Just before they got to the top of the hill they turned left onto a dirt road that soon took them into a deeply forested area. The trees were close on either side of the road—so close that Pup could see only the stars that were directly overhead. The darkness made him a bit uneasy. He wanted to say something then. But he didn’t. He did walk closer to Fox, though. 

Then they cam to another road and turned right onto it. The woods seemed even deeper and darker. Pup wanted even more to say something. But he didn’t’. He did move even closer to Fox. He noticed that Mole seemed closer to him on the other side. 

As they continued to walk on this road, the darkness grew; the trees almost seemed to meet over their heads. Then after a mile or so on this road Pup could see a bit of a break in the trees on the right. As they got closer he could see that it was a definite opening in the woods and he could see stars closer to the horizon over the tree line. But the extra light enabled Pup to see what was in the clearing. Pup stopped. He did not want to go any further—especially when he felt that Fox and Mole were turning to walk in that direction.

What Pup saw disturbed him. On the right side of that opening in the woods, he saw a dark old building—an old church. Even in the dim starlight, Pup could see that the church was deserted and had broken windows and missing boards. The boards were all dark and didn’t seem to have ever been painted. All that dark wood almost made the church blend in with the darkness of the woods. But the structure was large enough and visible enough that it loomed in the night’s darkness, its high and pointed roofline clearly visible against the sky making what seemed an unnatural and forbidding statement in the dark, but natural landscape. And behind the church and to the left, Pup could see tombstones in a cemetery, their irregular shapes in stone and marble slightly more visible in the starlight. 

No, no. Pup did not want to go any further. Then Pup felt Fox’s paw on his right side and Mole’s on his left and felt them, without words, urge him on. His trust of Fox and Mole was stronger than his fear and he moved with them. But he stayed very, very close. 

They walked to the right front of the church past the front door and its missing front steps to a place on the side of the church where missing and broken boards offered an opening. Fox climbed through the hole into the church; Pup and Mole followed. 

Once they were inside the church it took even Pup’s sharp animal eyes a moment to adjust to the darkness. But when they did he was amazed. For what he saw was that the church was filled with animals—animals of all kinds. Animals who at other times during the years were enemies were right there standing side by side without fear or worry. He saw mice and raccoons and opossums and porcupines and skunks and rabbits and a couple of beavers and squirrels and several other foxes and moles. He saw animals he had never seen before, but could guess from their shapes and sizes and equipment whether they were diggers or stalkers or foragers. He saw tow large cat-like creatures that he guessed were bobcats, animals he had only hear, screaming in the night. On the exposed rafters overhead he saw all kinds of birds: cardinals, sparrows, wrens, jays, but also, on the same perches, larger birds of prey—owls and hawks. And as he was looking up, he saw a very large bird, one he took to be an eagle, fly in through an opening at the end of the church and alight on a rafter next to several doves who moved over, not out of fear, but to make more room. On other lower perches he even saw game chickens and a few wild turkeys. And as he looked about the large room, Pup saw several deer thrust their heads through broken windows. 

Pup was surprised because though he was still cold, he felt no fear. He did wonder mightily at what he was seeing. They all waited, quietly, in stillness for a while, and then, just at twelve, just at the end of Christmas Even and the beginning of Christmas Day, Pup noticed that the church seemed to fill with a soft glow. And then he began to feel around him a special warmth and within him a sweet fullness – a warmth and sweetness that he had never felt before. He glanced up and all the other animals had bowed their heads. He did too. 

Then, after a few minutes, the glow faded and the animals quietly and slowly began to move out of the church to return to their nests and burrows. As they left, they greeted each other silently with nods and smiles. 

Fox, Mole, and Pup returned to Fox’s home in silence, the warmth and fullness still with them. They did not feel the cold. They slept warm and snug all that night and all Christmas Day they did not eat and did not feel hunger because of the sweet and peaceful fullness that lasted. Pup now knew about Antioch, but he also knew that it was not just something that happened at Antioch. That special thing happened wherever the animals gathered on Christmas Eve and sought communion and peace. 

Early in the morning on the day after Christmas Day Fox, Mole and Pup started preparing the meal they enjoyed that evening. They had corn and beans and sweet potatoes fixed in a souffle and several casseroles made with squash and cheese and onions and all kinds of breads and sweet muffins and hot apple juice spiced with cinnamon and, man, I get hungry just thinking about it all. After they had eaten (and cleaned up, they are neat creatures), they exchanged gifts. Mole got a muffler (one that he wished he had had on Christmas Eve) and a case for his glasses so they wouldn’t get scratched while he wasn’t wearing them (like when he was digging). Pup got a cap and a hot water bottle to put on his leg when it ached because of changes in the weather. Pup and Mole went together to get Fox a book he had long wanted for his collection –a history of Baroque and Classical music. For the next several days they ate and talked and enjoyed each other’s company (though Fox did spend a lot of time reading and humming over his new book, as we knew he would). 

Several days later Mole left to return to his house. Fox and Pup tried to convince him to stay, but Mole had other things on his mind: “I really enjoy being with you, especially at Christmas. Our times together make me stronger all through the year, especially when I am alone. But now it is time for me to return home to my place and my work. I really need to start a new tunnel tomorrow.” 

Fox worried at this because he knew that new tunnels were often dangerous and he knew that Mole had experienced several close calls in the bast. But he only admonished Mole to be careful. Danger, he knew, was a part of life for the animals. 

So they parted happily and Mole walked back to his snug home near Mt. Croghan. He thought of his friends as he fell asleep and dreamed that night of digging a long, wonderfully successful tunnel. 

And despite a few big rocks that he had to work around, the digging went well for Mole the next day—and for many days after that. 

THE END


Much Needed Change Is Happening...How To Be A Positive Force of Change

Coming Together

Coming Together

I’ve been quiet for some time now. Not knowing what to say. In some ways not even feeling I had the right to speak out for awhile because I know for a fact…that I have grown up myself with white privilege. Mostly, I wanted to allow the space that has been so needed for my brothers and sisters of color to be heard.

I’m ready to speak and my hope and intention is that this will help to move all of us forward. I was also inspired to develop a 5 Day Wellness Challenge to help you reconnect if you’re feeling depleted or out of touch with yourself, free of charge, as I know this is a trying time for us all.

Many years ago I had the incredible honor of performing at Obama’s SC/NC Inaugural Ball in Washington, DC for his first term as President. Recognizing that I was going to be able to be so close to this life changing time for all of us…this breakthrough of equality in our society of the first president of color of the United States…I felt an almost guilty sense of pride (since I’m white). Driving up on the bus with the rest of the jazz and blues musicians and singers, I realized that perhaps for the first time in my life, I was a minority. I was one of maybe three white people, everyone else was black. I remember feeling a little out of place but mostly so touched to be a part of this incredible group of musicians…of PEOPLE. I’d worked with many of the musicians before, and Skipp Pearson, our beloved legendary band leader had always been incredibly supportive of my vocal career and encouraged me to join in and perform with him and his band whenever I could. Everyone on that bus welcomed us all with open arms and the trip up was filled with laughter and riffing and sharing insights and music. And so much excitement.

To be honest, the actual performance at the Inaugural Ball was a bit of a blur. I was nervous and thought I was going to faint when I heard that Obama would be dropping in. As a lead jazz singer, I was used to being center stage, though I also love and know the importance of stepping back so our incredible musicians can shine. What I realized in a big way during a cover of R-E-S-P-E-C-T I sang with two other *phenomenal* black ladies (we joked that I was the white in the Oreo), was that A) holy Shnit, I had so much to learn from these ladies and mainly B) this was not about me. This was about all of these incredible black people here being a part of this historical event…a person of color in the highest office of the US. It was about us coming together as a group, riding this wave of energy together and being in the moment, creating and being in the flow.

That sense of togetherness continued as we all sat in the Green Room watching the inauguration on a wide screen television, holding hands. Watching, tears in our eyes, as the first black president of the United States was sworn in. And I thought “This is it. We have reached a place where black and white and all colors of skin are equal in this nation, perhaps even in this world.” I think that’s what most of us thought at that point.

What I didn’t realize at the time is that it’s not that simple.

We are in the process now, more than ever before, of becoming more aware of, educated about, in tune with, and changing the underlying systematic ROOTS of racism and prejudice. The seemingly subtle differences in the opportunities available to and treatment of white people and black, indigenous, asian, all other people of color…however you want to say it…and how these opportunities and treatment differs.

This is a journey, a trek, a marathon, not a sprint, so allow yourself the time and space to take care of yourself. Get yourself educated on what has been happening. Allow yourself to be with any guilt or shame or anger or anything else that comes up for you whatever the color of your skin. There are so many options out there of how to take action, I’m sure you’ve run across many many of them…choose two or three actions to take each week. I, myself will continue to educate and find ways that I can release white privilege and lift up my BIPOC brothers and sisters. I’m listing several resources below. Oprah is hosting several talks this week. You can also keep up with our educational offerings at BE YOGA in Charlotte, NC (online, so you can be anywhere), starting with delving into White Fragility by Dr. Robin DiAngelo. Another easy way to support is to frequent Black Owned Businesses (resources linked).

PS. Don’t let being afraid of making mistakes keep you from taking action to move forward. It’s gonna happen;)

Here is a great article for some actionable steps.

I Had the Covid! My Experience and Takeaways...

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*Note that NONE of this is medical advice.  It is simply my own personal experience with having the Covid-19 Coronavirus.  Always consult your physician for any medical advice. 

 

My intention in sharing my experience with you is to uplift, to give hope, and to inform.  I know that for me, it was helpful and soothing to communicate with other people who had it previously and to read about people’s experiences with having it online (keep in mind that I was very choosy about what I read…nothing super depressing or scary and that I didn’t read a whole whole lot!) .  I will share a breathing technique I did for the first time on Wed, May 13 when I was experiencing my strongest symptoms and I experienced a surge of energy within two hours and felt a big shift in my body (**I’m not saying that it is the thing that shifted the illness for me…simply sharing my experience).  

 

Here we go!  

The first week of May I was movin and groovin and having fun with teaching yoga, playing in the beautiful spring grass and admiring our beauuuutiful peonies, chasing a mole that lives in our fairy circle up front, and creating more online offerings.  But I started to notice that something with my body wasn’t operating the way it usually does.  I didn’t think a whole lot of it because, well…we’re human.  We inhabit these lovely bodies and experience peaks and valleys within them all the time.  

 

By the following week, however, I knew this was different.  Deep in my gut I knew I had the Covid (yes, I call it “The Covid” because it makes me giggle to call it that and it’s good to giggle about something that’s so charged).  I was having trouble getting out of the bed in the morning (I usually love getting up at 4am!), sleeping 14 hours and still exhausted, experiencing some shortness of breath (though not too bad), dizzy and really foggy and felt like a zombie.  It was all I could do to walk downstairs and collapse on the sofa each morning…late morning.  Other symptoms as well that you can read more about in addition to the onset and recovery in more detail in the next blog entry of The Little Golden Thread if you’d like to know more (I go through them day by day).  

 

Let’s take it back a bit…I promise we’ll get back to the Covid experience in a sec.  

 

Some of you know that in my 20s I was housebound and bedbound for upwards of 8 years with “Chronic Fatigue Syndrome” (also known as ME) and “Fibromyalgia,” both of which are diagnosed simply by ruling out anything else.  Medicine has not been able to identify what causes these conditions and there is no known “cure.”  Those 8 years held a lot of not knowing.  Not knowing from day to day how I was going to feel, whether I was going to be able to feed myself, make it up the stairs, or maybe have a good day and be able to take a 5 minute walk.  Not knowing if I would ever get better.  Not knowing what was causing all of the symptoms I was experiencing.  Not knowing if I would ever be able to pursue my acting career again, my singing career again, to run my 3-5 miles several days a week ever again…

 

During that time of my life I HAD to cultivate an acceptance of not knowing.  The alternative was to stay miserable and scared and constantly trying to figure it out, which is exhausting!  I ain’t gonna lie…it was hard to let go of trying to figure it out!  I did it though.  I got better and better at letting it be okay that I didn’t know and was able to develop a loving relationship with my body that had been lacking in a big way before.  The illness was also the advent of a deep spiritual connection and loving relationship with myself I’d been looking for my whole life.  

 

Now…back to a few weeks ago.  Because of the experience I had early on in my adult life with CFS, I didn't hold a lot of fear around having Covid.  I’m no stranger to mysterious illnesses.  In fact, I was *excited* that there was actually a test I could take that would verify my inner knowing (as excited as a zombie can be…)!  So Tuesday my honey drove me to the testing site (I was not capable of driving because of the dizziness) and I got the swab test and two days later got the results and they were…NEGATIVE.  Bah, so that was a little frustrating.  Yes, we’ve been talking about all this wonderful acceptance of not knowing, but I wanted validation!  Ha!  

 

Upon further research I found out that over 30% of the negatives are FALSE negatives, so decided to wait and get the antibody test.  Which ALSO has a high number of false negatives as I found out later (though I did test positive)…more on that in a bit.  

 

In the meantime, I’m talking and writing with a few people I know who contracted Covid 19 early on in the pandemic.  One person in March, another in April along with his whole family.  Every person experienced different symptoms, though there seem to be similarities within families (clusters).  The friend who got it with his whole family tested negative for the swab test while his whole family tested positive and he was obviously ill.  

 

So now let’s go to Wed, May 13, about four days into the thick of it.  I’ve had to give my yoga classes to one of our other sweet sweet teachers, though I do manage to still meet with my coaching clients online.  I have a friend on the west coast that I talk to every day and I told her what was going on and she suggested a breathing technique to me…the Wim Hof Method.  I was a little resistant at first…bah, another technique, another modality, etc.  I’ve been doing Pranayama (yogic breathing) for years!  But something kinda pulled me along, so I did a small amount of research and decided to give it a shot.  The method is basically 3-4 rounds of very vigorous breathing followed by a long suspension of the breath after an exhale and then a short suspension of the breath after an inhale.  I did the breathing for about 10 minutes.  

 

I mentioned I was like a zombie, right?  Within two hours of doing that breathing technique, I was talking my honey’s head off, whereas before I hadn’t wanted to utter a word, and even went into the kitchen to help him fix dinner, albeit a good bit of that time was spent sitting on the floor instructing him.  There was a very specific moment when it felt like my body and energetic system did an about-face.  The shift was almost palpable.    What just happened???  

 

The next morning I woke up after 8 hours of sleep (as opposed to 12) and though I still felt that hung over feeling and pretty awful, it was about 60% better than previous mornings.  I did the breathing again that morning.  By the afternoon/evening, most of my major symptoms (nausea, dizziness, fogginess, sore throat, headache, chills) were either gone or had decreased significantly.  I was (and am) sold.  Incidentally, the friend who told me about the breathing technique had only just run across it herself AND is the person who got me and the love of my life/honey together (in spite of much protestation from us both before we met in person).

 

By the following week I was feeling much better, though still very low energy and pretty shaky.  My measure of my shakiness was how much of the dropper full of Wellness Formula tincture I could get in my mouth versus dribbling it down my chin.  By the next Wed (May 20), my hands were again steady and sure.  

 

This whole thing has gotten me very curious about this illness.  In some ways the after effects feel very much like CFS symptoms.  Makes me wonder if perhaps they’re related.  I’ve spoken to another friend who had it early on and only she and one of their two children got it.  Her husband and other child were asymptomatic.  It presented for her with a lot of gastrointestinal symptoms and wheezing. And she’s had some residual fatigue and other symptoms that lasted for several months, as did one of my other friends I mentioned and the wife of the other friend I mentioned.  My female friend got two swab tests and both came back negative, as did her antibody test.  

 

I had a low grade fever for about an hour one day.  Otherwise my temperature was below normal.  I didn’t have lots of the symptoms you see listed as Coronavirus symptoms.  My honey had a few days of low energy but was asymptomatic (yay!).  And we still have no idea where I could have picked it up.  We have been very careful with masks and gloves, etc.  

 

It’s now been three weeks and my energy levels continue to get better, though I still don’t feel 100%.  I know that this may take some time and that’s okay (most of the time…I do have my little fits and allow myself to have a tantrum because I want to be at 100% again NOW;).  I am blessed that it was a mild case and that I was already in such good health.  I’m slowly adding more physical activities back in (I get to teach one of my yoga classes tomorrow, yay!).  I’m still doing the breathing technique and am excited to continue to learn more about it and to deepen that practice.  

 

All this to say…

-       If you think you may have Covid, treat yourself as if you do, even if you get a test and it comes back negative.  Take good care of yourself (which you’re already doing, hopefully!), consult with your physician, and rest.  Do all the things you know to do to take care of yourself like drinking lots of water and watching things that make you happy.  Isolate yourself as much as possible and know that it will pass.  If you do have significant trouble breathing or other heightened symptoms, get yourself to the hospital.  

-       Talk to a few other people you know who have experienced it and come out the other side. 

-       See if you can allow this time to be a sacred space.  Whether you have had Covid or not, what have you gained from this shared world-wide experience?  If you have had it or currently have it or are dealing with any kind of physical ailment…illness and recovery are ripe for big internal shifts.  Allow yourself the space to let them happen.  

 

I was inspired by the experience I had with Covid to share some of the things I do every day to keep myself connected and healthy in a 5 DAY WELLNESS CHALLENGE.  We’d love for you to join us, you can sign up at www.livingfrominspiration.com (the sign up window will come up once you’ve been on the site for a few seconds or you can go to the FREEBIES section).  It’s free and starts on June 22, but you can sign up anytime and start anytime after the start date.  Hope to see you there or at an upcoming event!  

 

Be happy.  Be healthy.  Be in love with yourself and your life.  

 

Big love,

Lorrie 

 

 

Six Simple Steps To Find Calm In The Midst of Chaos (with audio meditation!)

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Sooooo…things are pretty funky out there right now, right?  Not the yummy, groovy kind of funky.  More the “what the heck is happening??”, incredulous, dramatic, sometimes polarizing, anxiety-inducing kind of funky.  You can feel it in the air, see it in people’s faces, it’s almost palpable.  

I’m a fairly centered, drama-free gal, and I too, am finding that the current events and Covid (I call it “the C-word”) can take me from my typical warm and fluffy center into some anxiety.  Now, to a certain degree, this is a good thing!  We are all human.  We are connected.  We have emotions.  And we want to honor our humanity and our feelings.  Of COURSE we’re feeling wonky with everything that’s happening, especially so if we have loved ones who are in higher risk groups regarding the C-word.  

Where does that anxiety come from?  There’s a TON of uncertainty around just about every aspect of this thing.  How long will it last?  How much will it continue to spread in the US and beyond?  How can I help my loved ones who may be at risk?  How do I cancel my flights in a way so that I might get reimbursed?  Will the economy recover?  How do I get out of this public bathroom without touching the doorknob?  And so on and so forth.  

Now I have a question for you…how did reading that last paragraph make you feel?  It made me feel horrible!  Anxious and confused and scrambly.  I have another question for you…how many aspects of those questions do you have immediate control overthis second, right now?  None of them (alright, maybe the bathroom doorknob one…)!  Sure, you can reach out to airlines and you can take action to help loved ones (and I certainly recommend it!), but I’m talking right now, in this moment, what do you have control over?  The only answer is yourself.  You have control over your own actions, responses, and how you respond to any feelings that come up for you.  You have control over your perspective and how you focus your thoughts.  

ACTION:  Right now, *close your eyes and take that in.   Breathe with it.  You only have control over yourself.  

It’s a relief, right?  We can often feel like we need to be the General Manager of the Universe.  See if you can let go of that right now.  

On a more practical level, there are some actions you can take to find calm within all of this.  I’d like to share them with you in the hopes that they may assist you in coming back to that warm and fluffy place within yourself.  You’ll most likely find that you slip in and out of center, that’s always going to happen.  But when you continually practice these habits, your “hang time” in peace and center is longer and longer and longer.  AND you get to the place where being out of center isn’t as painful.  You can observe it, as opposed to getting caught up in it.  

SIX THINGS YOU CAN DO

1.  Practice an uplifting morning ritual.  And do it.  Every morning.  Before you do anything else!

You’ve probably heard of inertia, right?  An object at rest stays at rest, an object in motion stays in motion.  Well, our thoughts and emotions are the same way.  Once we start our thoughts on one trajectory, they tend to continue in that same direction.  First thing in the morning is a powerful time to set the tone for the rest of your day.  My morning ritual looks something like this:

-  put on some soothing, uplifting music

-  write down my intentions for the day:  ex: to have fun, to love and adore myself unconditionally, to love and adore every single person I encounter unconditionally…etc.  

-  write down 10-20 things I adore and appreciate:  ex: hearing the little bird singing outside (so active!!!), the unusual tint of the morning light I see right now, flowers!!!…etc.

-  sometimes read or listen to uplifting messages

-  take a hot bath with candles 

-  High Intensity Training and Yoga

-  meditate (5-15 minutes)

I don’t do all of them every single day, but most days I do.  This is BEFORE looking at any news, BEFORE reading any emails, and the first few things usually BEFORE interacting with anyone else.  Find a few things you enjoy and that feel good to you to start your day with.  I DO highly recommend writing your intentions, things you appreciate, and meditating first thing.  You can do all those in 10-20 minutes.  The others are bonuses first thing in the morning.  

2.  Practice yoga or dance.  Move your body in a mindful way.  Connect with it.  Allow yourself to be present with your body.  This is beneficial for your immune system AND beneficial in allowing you to more easily handle any stress that presents.  If you don’t have time to do a full class some days, just get on your mat for 5 minutes.  Do a down dog, a Sun Salutation.  Shake your booty to some tunes for 3 minutes.  

3.  Practice Nadi Shodhana - Alternate Nostril Breathing.  This is a simple, yet powerful technique that calms the nervous system, balances the two hemispheres of the brain, and settles the mind.  You can follow along with this video.  When I’m super busy and find myself feeling anxious, I set a reminder to go off every two hours and I sit my butt down and do Nadi Shodhana for 3 minutes.  It. Makes. A HUGE. Difference.  

4.  Limit your news time.  Try to keep your news time to 30 minutes or less a day.  That should be plenty to keep you up to date with the important happenings and at the same time, allow you to have plenty of breathing space and unplug from any mounting anxieties in the general public.  I would generally say keep it to 5 minutes or less a day, but given where we are right now with the C-word, you may find it needs to be more than usual.  

5.  Be the Witness.  This is something you can cultivate over time with things like meditation and mindful moment to moment presence, but even if you are new to the concept, you can start to employ it.  Allow yourself to approach everything as if you are a scientist observing.  Observe yourself.  Observe others.  Observe the media.  Observe the situations around you.  Even observe your emotions and thoughts.  Let go of opinions or conclusions for periods of time.  A good scientist doesn’t come to any conclusions until he’s observed objectively.  Being able to watch, rather than getting drawn into all the drama, is invaluable and gives you the ability to be objective and to take Skillful Action rather than being reactionary and acting from a place of fear and doubt.  See if you can come back to just watching again and again and again.  

6.  Allow your emotions.  Get to be friends with them.  Don’t try to push any anxiety away or reject it.  Welcome it with open arms…”hello old friend…I am here…I hear you.”  You don’t need to DO anything about the emotion or try to make it go away.  See, emotions are just energy, and energy wants to move.  Energy is always moving towards higher vibrations (like love, joy, peace, calm, etc).  It’s when we resist feelings that they get stuck in lower registers.  And, btw, having lower register feelings is not bad!!!  So feeeeel your feelings!  When you can combine #5, Be The Witness, with #6, Allowing Your Emotions, you're golden!  Because you don’t get bogged down in those feelings, you experience them for what they are…energy!  

and I’ll give you a bonus one…

7.  Laugh.  Find a way to lighten the mood.  Watch puppies doing cute things.  Remember something silly you did recently.  Make a funny face in the mirror.  

**

It is more important than EVER for each of us to take responsibility for our own well-being, physically and emotionally/energetically.  Start with these simple steps above and experience how much better YOU feel and in turn, what a calming and positive effect you have on those around you.  Be a leader of love, of calm within the chaos and I promise you, in this way you will contribute the most to your loved ones and in fact, to the world.  

Here is the Calming 5 minute Meditation for you to use. Let me know how it all goes for you!

Biiiiiig love,

Lorrie 

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Audio Meditation to Open Your Beautiful Heart and to Calm

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We had crrrraaaaaazy weather here in Charlotte (and the whole Southeast) last week, especially on Thursday. Tornados, high winds, flooding, lightening, mudslides, hail…I half expected to look out the window and see the four horsemen of the apocalypse galloping amidst the clouds and waving trees! With my Healing Codes coaching and Touchstone coaching I work with clients all over the world over Zoom or the phone and I had several of my awesome clients on this particular insane weather day. When I work with clients I need to be super tuned in and and have an open heart to assist them in the best way possible. On this day, we were under a Tornado Warning (which means “take cover, a tornado is pretty likely!”) for a good part of the day. So as I’m working with my lovely clients I’m having to keep an eye on the weather because at any moment I may need to duck into the closet under the stairs so that I’m safe from a tornado. Staying present with my clients in the midst of this chaos took some doing! So occasionally we had to take a break for a few moments while I check the weather and make sure I’m not about to be swept away to The Land of Oz (though THAT would be a fun adventure!). And then take a few moments to close my eyes, breathe, recenter and ground myself so we can move forward again in a meaningful way.

We fared the weather just fine (we always do…I’ll post on that phenomenon another time!) and the whole experience got me thinking about how important it is to be centered and “grounded” in order to be able to fully open our hearts. I love walking around with a completely open heart in my life and everyday interactions when I can, but I also know that if I do that without being rooted and centered that it can feel a little raw. A little TOO open. So there’s this wonderful balance we can find of calmness, connection to the earth, and at the same time, this heart that is completely open and giving and receiving love.

You can use the yummy meditation below to find this space. I suggest doing it whenever you feel you need grounding, if you find you’re having trouble in one of your relationships, if you don’t know what to do, or…if you just want to feel good;. The seed mantra for the heart is “Yam,” pronounced “yum.” You can experience “YUM” in your life by opening your heart. Give it a shot and let me know how you feel afterwards!

Stick Your Finger Into More Cakes in 2020! (and don't be afraid to ask;)

A few weeks ago on the way back from teaching my 6:30am yoga class, I stopped in at one of my favorite local Health Food stores.

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I love how quiet it is in those early morning hours and feeling the beginning bustle of the lovely employees getting nourishing food ready for customers.

I was hoping to get a rotisserie chicken, so I asked one of the employees in the deli if they had any ready. He was a large stoic fellow, probably of Pacific Islander descent. He said they would be ready in about 10 minutes, and I decided it would be worth the wait, so I stuck around.

There was a cake sitting on the counter where we were discussing the chickens and I noticed that it was sweating profusely (as cakes often do in the Southeast). I asked him if they were throwing it out. His reply was “no, it’s for display, do you want a piece?” I was feeling particularly frisky this morning (as I often do) so I replied “no, but I do want to stick my finger in it!”

He without pause or reaction…completely deadpan, responded “okay." He pushed the cake towards me.

Now. I feel I need to explain a bit further before we continue. I haven’t eaten cake or sugar for that matter for a few decades. And honestly I never really was a big fan of it and given what I know now about what it does to the body, I just stay away from it.

I DO, however, love sticking my finger into cakes, pies, brownies…whatever. Feeling the gooey goodness and the different layers and the texture in a tactile way is very satisfying and just feels yummy (and it’s pretty annoying to the people whose desserts I might happen to stick my finger in…you can ask my sister;). I guess it’s my own way of experiencing the culinary creation.

Back to our story. If you remember, my stoic friend had just very matter of factly given my strange request of sticking my finger into this pristine (though very sweaty) cake the go ahead. I kinda couldn’t believe that he’d said yes, so my response was an incredulous “Realllllly??” “Sure.” Again…completely deadpan response to this very out of the ordinary request. So. I took a nice deep breath, poised my finger over the cake, and deliciously pressed my finger into the icing, first layer, second layer…third. Oh. So. Satisfying. Took my finger out, wiped it off, he grabbed a spatula, cut out the piece with the hole in it and dumped it in the trash, immediately turned around and picked up my (now ready) rotisserie chicken and handed it to me. I smiled and said, “Thank you, you made my day!” “No problem,” (still no smile or anything). He turned around and went on to his next task and I smiled and walked to the checkout with my chicken.

As I was sitting in my car in the parking lot, I took a few moments to savor all the FUN and sheer ABSURDITY of the whole experience. First of all, well…BEST MORNING EVER…and secondly, I fully recognized the importance of ASKING. I had the impulse to make a request that was completely off the wall. I thought he would just laugh and think I was joking. But he listened and said YES. In essence, I had a desire, asked and was open enough that Universe provided the window to receive the manifestation of that desire through my wonderful deadpan deli friend.

We all have these off-the-wall, sometimes absurd desires that we may think are impossible or that no one will understand or honor. Or perhaps not so off the wall. Maybe they just feel out of reach or like we can’t possibly create them or allow them in. Give yourself some credit. Don’t be afraid to ask (and…you’re actually always asking even if you don’t verbalize it…more on that in another post;). If it’s a “no” right now…it just means you have some more getting happy and lining up to do. My goal in the whole finger-in-cake interaction was to have fun and to play with my fellow human being. Approaching it that way, you can only win, regardless what the answer is!

What is a fun, silly, off the wall desire you have? How can you play today? What is something you are afraid to ask for? Remember that to Universe, there is no request too silly, too big or too small.

The Power of APPRECIATION

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The Power of PRECISE Appreciation and Gratitude. I love my early morning drives from southern Indian Land to Uptown Charlotte to teach my awesome yoga classes . It takes about 40 minutes (at 5am, so no traffic, woohoooo!) and I use the time to talk to the Divine, to set my intentions for the day and to go on Rampages of Appreciation. This morning it was deliciously foggy and soupy, and the lack of visibility gave me an opportunity to appreciate how circumstances in our lives can bring us into the present more fully. With the lack of visibility I was really forced to be present and focus (or take a little detour into a ditch, ha!). So rather than getting grumpy about the fog I found myself feeling playful and appreciative of it (this comes naturally now because I practice Appreciation every morning). I loved the way the fog hid the future of the road from me so that as I arrived in each new moment it was a surprise…and a surprise…and a surprise. The way it softened the edges of the beautiful trees and bushes along 521 and then along Park Road. The fact that *teeny tiny particles of water were floating, suspended in the air (huh…that’s a miracle in and of itself!) and the way the light from the lamp posts streamed through and bounced off of those teeny tiny particles. And then I started thinking about the fact that WE HAVE ELECTRICITY and how stinkin cool that is! So I rambled on about how amazing it is that we have currents of electricity that run into our houses and supply us with light and with heat and with the ability to cook yummy things and to watch fun TV shows and to light the road. And then I started thinking of all that goes into that incredibly intricate system and all the people that work diligently to bring that electricity to us. And then I started thinking about all the people who came before and the fact that the idea and execution of harnessing electricity to utilize it in useful ways started with just a few people who were willing to experiment and take risks and open up to possibilities. Wow! And on and on and on!

You can maybe possibly see how when you start with something simple and get *specific about what you Appreciate and Love and are Grateful for about it, you really get the juicy goodness from it. You can keep milking one little thing for all it’s worth. What you will find is that when you start your day with this deep, juicy Appreciation, your day flows more smoothly. You feel more at ease. Your interactions are pleasant. It sets the tone for your whole day! It may be a bit of a stretch to begin with and I do still have days now and again where I *just plain don't feel like being Appreciative...I feel like being grumpy. And that's okay too!


Take a look around you right now. Choose an object. It can be a pen. It can be a person. It can be your pet. What - *specifically* - do you Appreciate and Love about it or them? What *specifically* makes you Grateful for it or them? When you get Precise you really get the juiciness of this Practice. And you’ll start to do it not because it’s “spiritual” or the “right thing to do” or whatever. You’ll start doing it because it FEELS good. Because it sets the tone for your day. Because it reminds you of what a precious, amazing, incredible world we live in. And Practice it about yourself! What do you Love and Appreciate about yourself?

Have a beautiful day. It’s all so good. *contented sigh*

Are You Having Trouble Being Present?

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I have an absolute love/frustration relationship with our yard. So much so that I realized recently that I probably think about it 10-200% of the time. I’ve never really had a yard except for when I was growing up and even then I only did the occasional mowing. I did try to grow tomatoes a few times (that did NOT work). As an adult I’ve always lived in places with small yards that were maintained by others.

And now. An acre and a half. Which I LOVE. I love all the space, I love the animals that come to visit, I love the possibilities. But when we moved in, there was basically no landscaping and a good deal of the yard was littered with strange objects (a porcelain doll’s arm was one of the weirdest) and a lot of glass and nails.

In my enthusiasm and eagerness to have a beautiful outdoor space (and my love of flowers and plants and tomatoes), I’ve become a Lowe’s orphan garden section junkie. This is the section where they put the plants that are not doing so well out to pasture. And mark them waaaaay down. It’s one of my faaaaavorite things to do to go and peruse this section and discover beautiful plants that I can bring back to life. I love studying them and the exotic names and all the varieties. Stella D’Oro. Hibiscus. Lantana. Lorapetalum. I love learning whether they like sun or shade. Whether they like lots of water or whether they like to be ignored.

Thing is, inevitably, in spring and fall we end up with 20+ plants still in pots in various places in the yard that are eagerly awaiting to be planted in the earth. Also inevitably, they sit. And they sit. And they sit. They do get watered and they get loved but man…we’re busy!! Planting them takes some time that we haven’t been able to find lately.

So I find myself guiltily thinking about all these beautiful plants and when the heck I’m going to plant them. A LOT. And for some reason I just recently realized that all these guilty ruminations are not helping them or me. I’m not enjoying them AND it’s making it more difficult for me to actually take the action. Basically, I’m NOT BEING PRESENT. Ha! I know I know. It took me awhile, but I got there.

It’s not that it’s inherently bad to think about the past or the future, but if we’re caught in one or the other perpetually, were missing out on our present. In this case…I’m not really enjoying my beautiful plants because I’m stuck in the future of when and how I’m going to plant them. And I’m missing the things that are actually around me when I’m not around the plants.

So…my decision is to change this thought pattern. I am focusing on enjoying these beauties. AND on allowing myself to BE WHERE I AM and to appreciate it all. Take it all in. Because it really is all here for us to enjoy.

Oh, and our tomatoes are THRIVING! :)

The Power of Daily Scrum Calls

You heard me correctly. Scrums. Yeah, it’s a weird word. The first time I heard it, I actually laughed out loud! I’d vaguely heard of it before in the context of rugby. It’s when they huddle up and regroup and plan in the game. That was the only place I thought Scrums existed.

Little did I know, a “Scrum” is actually also a very powerful business tool most successful companies use on a daily basis. Their “teams” huddle up virtually and each person gives a short update on what they’ve accomplished, any roadblocks they may have run into (so that others on the team can offer solutions), and what they plan to do that day towards the team’s goal. People can also ask any questions they have that might help move each other forward. A Scrum Call is typically kept to 15 minutes.

This is a very simple explanation of Scrums…there’s a whole world out there around it. There are even Certified Scrum Masters.

You don’t have to become a Scrum Master in order to apply this powerful concept;) A few months ago, a brilliant mentor and friend of mine suggested I start doing a similar action. I did, and it’s been incredible! It builds a momentum in your projects that you can’t even imagine. Even as I’m writing this, I’m looking back at when we started our Daily Scrums and I’m astonished at everything that’s happened since and how things keep showing up.

Basically, you choose a focus or project and you and a friend or two connect every day (well, every week day;). You follow the basic Scrum formula by each sharing small triumphs and what actions you took since the last call and then what actions you’re going to take that day. Remember to keep it to 15 minutes or less. You can find a time to socialize later. Similar to a Mastermind Group, but the daily consistency creates this vortex that pulls in synchronicities you (almost) can’t imagine!

I’ll be going into more detail about Daily Scrum meetings and other Success and Business Strategies in Online Courses that you can take advantage of in early 2020. Give it a shot and let me know how it goes!

Review: The Derminator (Microneedling Machine)

(*Please note I don’t get any referral fees for this review or associated links in this article. Sometimes I do.)

(*Also please note that I am not a doctor and none of this is medical advice. Always consult with your doctor first.)

The first time I heard about microneedling, I was (understandably) dubious. Why on earth would I want to pierce my skin with tons of needles? I dismissed it at the time and that was that.

A few months later I ran across it again (can’t remember where) and decided to look into it a little more. What I found out was that when done correctly and safely, it’s actually *very cool* and a highly effective way to reduce lines, plump skin, and address scars, in addition to other added anti-aging and skin care bonuses. I wanted to give it a shot! I spent hours and hours researching it and finally purchased a “roller” online for about $30. I was a little freaked out about doing it but finally sucked it up and gave it a shot. It was time consuming and slightly painful, but I could tell a bit of a difference over the next few weeks. From my research I knew that it would take several months and a few treatments to really be able to tell a difference.

Because of all the prep time and such, I didn’t get back to it for some time. Many many months later, during one of my compulsive research sessions, I ran across The Der-mi-nator (you have to say it in an Ahnold Schwarzenneger voice;). No, it’s not a weapon of destruction. The Derminator is a Microneedling Machine developed by Sarah Vaughter. She has a website with a forum that has TONS of information about how to use the machine and answered customer questions. Fascinated, I poured over the forum and the website, absorbing as much about this fascinating contraption as I could. The forum stopped being active in 2014 because of regulatory issues but you can find all you need to know from the previous posts and answers.

The Derminator machine is automated and works much faster and more accurately than a derma roller. It is, of course, more expensive, but it is very reasonable at $190 with free shipping and needle cartridges included. You will need to buy new needle cartridges occasionally, but those are very reasonable as well and if you were to use a derma roller consistently, you would need to buy a whole new one after a few uses as well. The owndoc.com shop also offers sanitization options and high-quality facial care products at a fraction of the cost of comparable high end products.

I truthfully haven’t used the Derminator consistently enough yet to be able to say whether it performs miracles, but after the two times I’ve used it thus far I can definitely say that it is faster and easier to use than a roller and I definitely recommend it. Make sure to read up on the forum and study the instructions and videos before you use it (or any other rolling device). The main things to remember: sterilize, sterilize, sterilize, and only do deep rollings every 4 - 6 weeks at the most. Have fun and let me know how it goes!

The Power of Looking Like an Idiot ;)

This past weekend I took a Slackline Yoga class for the first time. The National Whitewater Center here in Charlotte has this *incredible festival every year with 4 days of Yoga, Climbing, Music, Rafting, Races, and a whole bunch of other things. And Slackline Yoga was one of the classes they offered and I was so excited to take it (we also did Acro Yoga…you can take a look at a pic of us below;)! If you don’t know what Slacklining is (I didn’t before a few years ago), it’s basically like a tightrope, just thicker. And in this case, a LOT lower to the ground;) I’ve played around with it before when I lived in LA…there’s a Slackline community in Venice Beach and I’d go down there and play around on the lines on the beach with the group.

The thing I love about Slackline is that you’re just gonna look like an idiot. Guaranteed. When you’re just starting out learning how to walk the line, 99% of the time your foot shakes, shakes, shakes on the line and bobbles back and forth like you’re having convulsions (which feels really weird). And you’re gonna fall. Guaranteed. Even if you’re a seasoned, experienced Slackliner, you’re gonna fall. And you’re going to be *constantly* adjusting to find balance and stay on the line.

As a recovering Perfectionist, the prospect of looking like an idiot, falling off the line, and not knowing how to do everything…you got it, perfectly…used to be terrifying. It came as a pleasant surprise to me that this time…I was actually excited about it!!!! “Yeah!! I’m gonna fall off, I’m gonna look like an idiot, I’m gonna shake…other people will probably experience the same kinds of things…and it’s gonna be glorious!” And it was! We all laughed at ourselves and at each other. We all surprised ourselves with what we could do and sometimes with things that were harder than we thought they would be. We all challenged ourselves to do things that toed the line of our comfort zone and expanded our vision of what’s possible.

And the big takeaway for me is that I’m actually OKAY with looking like an idiot. It’s okay that I’m *not perfect at it.

The underlying message here is one of Self-Love. Bring this into your everyday life in every moment. If you notice a thought you’re having that you’d rather not have or a feeling you’d rather not feel or find yourself doing something you didn’t mean to do or…looking like an idiot…be kind to yourself and love and appreciate it for what it is. A beautiful experience. An integral part of our life here. Whatever the experience may be. And love, love, love yourself for having the experience. *That’s* unconditional love!

Okay, so I don’t look like an idiot here but I didn’t have any pictures of falling off of the Slackline!  I promise I’ll post one at some point on Insta and FB;)

Okay, so I don’t look like an idiot here but I didn’t have any pictures of falling off of the Slackline! I promise I’ll post one at some point on Insta and FB;)

What's My Name? Fire Sauce Giveaway

This pretty lady needs a name! Enter what you want her name to be below and sign up for our newsletter and you could win a bottle of your choice of our MOMMA RIVERS FIRE SAUCE. Follow us on Instagram and FB for extra entries. We have lots of yummy flavors, including Hot Honey!, Danger Will Robinson! (our hottest sauce!), and Chocolate Nirvana that has a smokey, chipotle flavor.

What do YOU think my name should be?

What do YOU think my name should be?

And you can, of course, get your very own bottle of Fire Sauce at one of our events or at the Artisans Hub of Waxhaw.

The Power of Taking Your Sweet, Sweet Time

This morning I woke up and I could tell it was going to be what I call a “God day” (God, Universe, Presence, All-That-Is…whatever you want to call ‘it’). I have these sometimes and they’re lovely. It means that my focus is very broad and that it feels much better and more in line to go with the flow throughout the day than to Try. To. Do. The things. On my list. I take a look at my list and choose the ones I absolutely positively must get done and throw everything else out the window.

A few weeks ago I was *very very VERY* busy and within all that busyness I lost myself. I was under a deadline and had put some extremely high expectations on myself. After the deadline had passed and the dust settled, I realized that I hadn’t been taking good care of myself. Even more importantly, I’d stopped having fun! I was exhausted and needed a rest.

I tend to like to do things intensively. I love the feeling of really digging into something and going at it for hours and hours. And days and days. But upon reflection of this last experience and others, I can see that after awhile I wasn’t fully present, which means it would have been best to stop for a bit and get back into myself.

When we’re involved in large projects or dealing with stressful situations, it often seems we don’t have the TIME to get back to ourselves. The thing is, we ALWAYS have the time to get back to ourselves. And ultimately, taking that time will save time. And be better for us physically, mentally and emotionally as well! Sure, it’s okay and even fun to burn the midnight oil at times, just always make sure you do have some down time. Take a nap. Take a walk in nature. Listen to some music with your eyes closed. Meditate. Lie in the sun and soak it up like a lizard. Do something to slowwww dowwwn for at least a few minutes when you find yourself in a revved up place.

My honey and I have both been b***s to the wall again and here’s what I’m finding is working like a charm. PRACTICAL APPLICATION: Set your phone alarm to go off every two hours (I love the Chimes alarm sound on iPhone…it’s so sweet!). When that alarm goes off, stop whatever it is you’re doing (within reason, of course) and take TWO MINUTES to breathe, set an intention, and let go of everything. After that two minutes, get back to it! ;)

And listen to your Inner Guidance. If you wake up and it feels like a God day, allow yourself to have one. If you work or if you have appointments already booked, that’s okay! You can still have a God day. Allow yourself to be quiet and listen throughout your day. Allow yourself to hand it over. Allow yourself to let go of taking anything too seriously or trying to figure it out. Whenever you mind starts to kick into overdrive, kindly thank it and let it know that you’re choosing not to think too much today.

Allow yourself to see things and experience them from a very broad perspective, as if looking down from atop a high mountain. Reconnect with yourself/the Presence. Ultimately, you’ll be so glad you did. And so will everyone around you. Most of the time you’ll find that more gets accomplished than if you’d been running around doing everything on your list and stressing about it! Give it a shot and let me know how it goes.

Big love,

Lorrie

Pics from our last event!

I had a great time at the Carolina Cajun Meats opening. The weather was gorgeous and the people were so much fun…

The Power of Giving Up!

I’ve been working lately on an amaaaaazing sculpture that I’m so psyched about it! It’s a 6 foot needle. What am I going to do with it, you ask? Well…it goes with the very large spool of thread I’m making! Hee. That’s always my answer when people ask me that question. It never gets old.

In order to make my 6 foot needle (which was a whole story of letting go and allowing within itself that I may share at some point), I needed to procure an 8 foot 4x4 post made of Fir wood. Searched high and low for a few weeks and ended up finding a lumber yard in Charlotte that carries them, so after a few mishaps, I set out on a cold, rainy, dreary Wednesday a few weeks ago in our truck to get it. I was finally going to get my needle!

Now this is a TRUE lumber yard, meaning mostly construction people there, not too many little ladies, and I was all gussied up in a pair of my leggings and a nice top to meet some friends later. Keep that in mind for later.

When I drove up to this lumber yard, the parking lot was completely full!!!! I mean…hundreds of cars. I had to park waaaaaay far away from any entrance. Not only that, I didn’t know what entrance to go to! I called the yard to see where I should go and if I could talk to someone to try to expedite the process and the receptionist immediately put me through to someone who worked there and I got…voicemail. Called back and she again put me through to someone else…guess what? Yup. Voicemail. This continued 3 more times. I’d been on the phone earlier that morning with my bank trying to work out some discrepancies and was already frustrated and after this ridiculousness, I was just about in tears. I hung up after that third time and a grizzly guy with a beard down to his belly button had walked up to his truck across from mine and we exchanged a funny glance…I think he was puzzled and probably thinking “what the hickety heck is that little lady doing here?” and mine was a slow realization that I might be able to ask him some questions about how this whole thing works!

I popped my head out of the car and said hi and asked him how it works, he told me where to go and said that he’d been there waiting for 45 minutes for his ticket to get fulfilled! And he said that he had NEVER seen it this crowded before. Well. I had apparently picked the wrong day. And I was just about to POP, I was so frustrated.

So I had a little hissy fit. Right there in the car. Yes, I waited until my grizzly friend left, but man, did I let loose after that. It felt soooooo good. I yelled a little bit and thrashed around a little bit and then I felt better. And then I just yelled to the Universe, “Okay! I give up!!!!” And I did. I gave up completely and left to meet my friends.

***

After lovely hanging out/business meetings with my lovely peeps (I love it when it can be both!), I felt even MORE better (yes, that’s what I said) and had the thought of, “well, the lumber yard is only 10 minutes away, I’ll go and see what it looks like now.”

Parking space - right in front of the entrance. Customer service - guy open with no one in line. Ordered it right away. Then a nice man took me into the warehouse and we chose the PERFECT piece of wood for the needle. It is *gorgeous. Perfect grain, no knots. I wasn’t positive about what I was looking for, but this guy knew what would be best and once he started pointing things out to me about the grain and compression and knots, I got it. He grabbed that perfect one for me, I pulled around and nestled safely in the truck bed. The whole process took about 15 minutes.

I was running HIGH resistance that morning when I tried the first time. The best thing to do WAS to Give Up. It was too hard. There were too many roadblocks. When it’s that difficult, I know that I’m not lined up and that I need to give myself some time and feel it out and try again another time. And it will be easier.

And it was!

Oftentimes we think we need to try to push through things. Most of the time if we just take a step back, hand it over to Universe, and get out of the way, things will line up and go much more smoothly when we come back to them. I run into this over and over again with my artwork, with my music, with my…everything! With any problem that comes up, really. When I soften around it and allow myself to feel the feelings (like I did when I had my little fit in the truck) and then let it all go, inevitably, the answer shows up. Sometimes it might take awhile and that’s okay too.

Give it a shot. I think you’re gonna like it:)

Here’s the first incarnation of the needle. I’ll post the full sculpture (with the spool…going outside right now to work on it!) when it’s done.

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The Power of Imperfect Meditation

A lot of people think that when you meditate you’re not supposed to have any sounds happening around you or any distractions or any thoughts. And that if you do, you’re not doing it “right.” Well…we live in the world, so we’re gonna have distractions and we are HUMAN, so we’re gonna have thoughts. It doesn’t mean you’re not meditating “right.” There is no “right” way to meditate. Personally, I have days where my brain is so nice and quiet and *sighhhhhh*, oh, so serene. And then there are days where my mind is jumping and skipping and diving allllll over the place! Funny enough, on those days, I welcome what would most people would probably call “distractions” because they actually remind me to refocus and just witness the bouncing, running thoughts, rather than chase after them.

Read on for a funny case and point AND a little anecdote to help you remember the point of all meditation AND another fun video.

First, you gotta watch this video, it’s the frickin funniest thing in the world! They are trying SO HARD. The one on the right in front cracks me up about half way through the video. Oh, and the girl on the left who’s dancing the whole time. Well, all of them crack me up!

K-sweet-man and I meditate for 10-15 minutes every morning. This particular morning a few weeks ago was very very very cold (well, at least for down here in SC…in the 30’s) and our heater was running running running. I’d woken up and done my yummy morning routine and was feeling bubbly with laughter. So we sat down to meditate and I was already feeling that bubbling and then the heater turned off and let out a big ole *siiiiiiiiiigghhhhhhh*. If you’ve ever seen the movie Hitchhiker’s Guide to The Universe, it was exactly like the sigh the doors in the spaceship make when they open and close…it’s a human sound, I swear! I wish I had a recording of it so you could hear it!

Like I said, I was already feeling giggly and bubbly and I just BURST out LAUGHING in the middle of the meditation. And you know what? That meditation is a perfect meditation to me. I’ve promised myself never to hold in laughter. It’s so so SO very good for us and it feels so good. I allowed myself to flow with it. Well, I really couldn’t help it, it just came out, so there’s that too;)

The whole point of meditating is to raise our vibration, to witness ourselves, to gain perspective, etc. I can’t think of a better way to do all of those and more than being tickled to bubbly laughter!

This clip makes me laugh too…

Spicy Banana Bread (this is not a recipe...unless you want it to be!;)

I sometimes swish with coconut oil in the mornings (oil pulling), usually for about 20 minutes. Which means I can’t talk. Or sneeze (yikes!). Or, in the case of this morning…laugh.

Making breakfast for my honey, had heated some delicious coconut flour banana bread I made (I’ll share the recipe sometime!). I’d buttered it. Wanted to add some specialness to it, so decided to put some yummy cinnamon on all three pieces. Shaking away (we have those really big spice containers from Sam’s) and had the thought of “huh…the consistency doesn’t look like typical cinnamon powder…” Managed to finish all three pieces before I realized that I’d just put a LARGE AMOUNT of CAYENNE PEPPER on all three pieces.

Now remember…I CAN’T LAUGH because I have a mouthful of coconut oil.

So what do you do when you’ve just poured cayenne all over your honey’s yummy banana bread? Well…you put cinnamon on it, of course! Which is exactly what I did.

Then I wrote him a note to warn him and went and showed it to him, all the while, trying to keep from bursting into laughter, which would have resulted in explosions of coconut oil from nostrils and mouth. That was a feat, guys.

The note says it all.

The note says it all.

I haven’t had a chance to ask him how his breakfast was yet. I’ll let you know.

Update: He is the sweetest. This was his text: “Thank you for the yummy interesting breakfast baby. Good delivery system for healthy nutritious cayenne and cinnamon.” And turns out he didn’t really understand what the note meant until he’d taken a bite of the banana bread and realized there was cayenne on it!

The culprits.

The culprits.

A Special Holiday Story With Fox and Mole and Pup

(you can listen to the recorded version at the end…in William’s voice!)

The Christmas Story
(with Fox, Mole, and Pup)

by Dr. William Rivers
copyright 1995

Foreword by Lorrie

We - my family and I - have gotten together to bring you Fox & Mole's Christmas Story by my father, William Rivers - just for you this holiday season. I believe that the story is written in such a way that it is universal…not just for Christmas, but for Chanukah, Kwanzaa, or really anytime! We hope you enjoy! Also remember you can listen to the recorded version below. And for reference in the story, Ashleigh is my sister (William’s daughter) who found the Squirrel baby (which is its whole other story Dad wrote) and Evan is my brother (William’s son) who found Pup (yet another story Dad wrote).

~~~~

FOREWORD: A few days ago my friend Kristin was at yoga class and called me very excited afterwards to tell me something. At the end of each class, we have a meditating/resting period for 10 or 15 minutes called "Savasana." When her class finished with Savasana on this Tuesday, the instructor told them to get up very quietly and cautiously and to look at the back door...a fox had been watching them during the whole meditation with its nose pressed up against the glass of the door. The fox peeking in made me think of my Father's Christmas story.  

My father always made up stories for my brother, sister and me when we were younger. They featured "Fox and Mole" who were friends and part of a vast and very social animal community that lived on my Mema & Papa's property and in the surrounding woods in Mt. Croghan. Dad created these magical worlds of animals that we all - my brother and sister and I - interacted with in the stories. And we always learned something from them. His Christmas story is one of my favorites and he would tell it to us from memory every Christmas, sometimes embellishing it with new story lines or variations on previous years. 

Because I'd been thinking about the Yoga-loving fox my friend Kristin told me about, I recently revisited the Christmas Story my father wrote. As I was reading it, I got a warm, full feeling inside and this light went on inside me! I'd been hearing people around me talk about how stressed out they were from the holidays and how crazy this time of the year is. This story that my father wrote illustrates so well what these holiday times are REALLY about - they aren't about the shopping or the entertaining or the decorating (though those are fun parts of it if we allow them to be) - the holidays are about Peace and Joy and Fullness and Connecting with those we love. 

Because the story had such an impact on me and helped me to remember where I want my focus to be this season...I wanted to share that with you! So...we have all gotten together to bring you Fox and Mole's Christmas Story and to share with you what we hope is an uplifting and rewarding, warming, loving experience. 

We hope you enjoy and this is our way of saying Happy Holidays to you and your family from all of us! 


The Christmas Story
(with Fox, Mole and Pup)

If you had been watching the road between Mt. Croghan and Thompson Creek on that real cold, windy Christmas Eve several years ago, you would have been blessed with an odd sight. For on that evening, well after dark, you would have seen a little creature all bundled up in a coat, cap, and even little boots walking very quickly in short little steps toward Mt. Croghan. It was Mole. His hands were pushed deep into the pockets of his wool coat. His shoulders were scrunched up so his coat collar would meet his cap, and his chin was tucked way down against his chest. These maneuvers, though they made Mole’s appearance even odder to behold, did help to keep out the cold so that Mole was pretty warm—except when the wind, which was blowing from his back, gusted up. When that happened Mole’s cheeks tingled and he felt cold air coming in around his collar and the bottom of his coat. But Mole did not stop. He just scrunched and tucked and walked a little faster. 

“What a cold Christmas Eve to be out,” muttered Mole to himself as he moved along. “Sure do wish I were back in Fox’s nice warm den drinking hot tea.” Even the memory of Fox’s home and hospitality, now at least a half an hour and a mile behind him, made Mole feel warmer inside despite a fresh and decidedly colder gust of wind. 

Mole did not usually take such long walks alone at night in the winter—especially on Christmas Eve. But there was a good reason for this late night excursion. Way back before Thanksgiving he had agreed to keep all of Squirrel’s Christmas gifts in one of his spare rooms so Squirrel’s very active five children wouldn’t find them. The gifts had been stacked away in his spare bedroom since early December. And to his horror Mole had almost forgotten. He had assured Squirrel that he would be there to help him retrieve the gifts. But since then Fox had invited him to spend Christmas Eve at his house so that Mole could go with them on Pup’s first trip to Antioch. It had been a little over seven months since Fox and Mole had found Pup lying beside Number 9 after being hit by a car and had gotten Evan to help them carry him to Fox’s house so they could set Pup’s broken leg in a cast. Pup still had a bit of a limp, but he could get around just fine and he was quickly catching onto the ways of the “wild” animals. But he hand not yet been to Antioch at Christmas. 

Mole loved going to Antioch at Christmas and he loved the warmth and Christmas smells and cheer he always found at Fox’s. So he went. And it was only in the early evening of Christmas Eve as Mole sat in a deep easy chair beside the fire looking at Fox’s tree with the few, but very carefully wrapped packages underneath that Mole remembered. He was bundled up and out the door almost before Fox could ask what the trouble was. 

Every time he thought of how he almost forgot, Mole scolded himself and felt guilty and cold inside. But when he thought about how happy Squirrel’s children would be—especially the new little orphan squirrel Ashleigh had found and Squirrel and his family had adopted—Mole felt warmer inside. Cold guilt contended with warm satisfaction in Mole’s little breast until the warm won out. “There’s no way I could have completely forgotten,” Mole assured himself. I believe that—don’t you?

Mole was almost there. Just a short stretch of road and he would be in Mt. Croghan. Then a left turn on the north road, a brisk walk up the hill past the church and then down into the next hollow, a right turn on his special little path which crossed the field into the woods at the bottom of the filed and he would be there. As he made his left turn on to the north road, he began to hear sounds like music even over the sound of the wind. Soon he could see that that church was all lit up and the townspeople, at least a good many of them, were at church for a Christmas Eve service. When he got to the church, he paused to listen. The animals who were Mole’s friends had mixed feelings about people. Many of the things people did were not very nice, but a few things they did were quite nice. Mole said to himself, “this is one of the nice things.” Mole had listened before and even peeked in to see just what was going on. Even out in the cold he could easily imagine the warmth and friendship and cheer of the people inside; of the lights on the tree; of the brown paper bags tied with bright ribbon that Grace Gibson had filled with fruit and nuts and candy from her store up Number 9; of how excited and happy the children were as they thought of the goodies the next morning would bring. “They are really quite like us when you get down to the basic things,” Mole thought to himself. He stayed long enough to hear Edit Atkinson at the organ and Mema at the piano start “Silent Night” and then hear the small group bravely begin to sing with Billy Adams’ clear and strong baritone rising above all the other voices. And as they finished with “sleep in heavenly peace” Mole remembered his destination and felt again the cold wind, now in his face. He turned and scurried up the road and on toward his home. 
Even before he got half way across the filed, Mole was sure he could hear Squirrel; he almost thought he could see him squirreling quick, quick back and forth (oh, that’s what squirrels do—they don’t pace back and forth, they squirrel quick, quick back and forth) on that large branch up high in the oak tree where Squirrel and his family lived. But it was after dark and even though the stars were shining bright in a clear sky and even with the glasses Mole wears (the ones Little Lorrie found for him soon after they met years ago) he knew that he couldn’t see Squirrel. Mole did hear him though; and Mole knew what he was doing so it was almost like he could see Squirrel. 

Mole figured that Squirrel was worried and fussing. He was right. Squirrel was really beside himself (and Squirrel can move so quickly that he can almost be beside himself when he wants to. At least that’s the way it looks to my slow eyes). Anyway Squirrel was saying (and saying it very quickly indeed so that you have to read his sentences at least three times as fast as normal, that’s why it’s written in smaller, faster type):

“Where is that Mole? He should have been here long ago. Bet he forgot. Forgot about our gifts. Our gifts in his spare bedroom. What are we gonna do? The kids will be so disappointed. Oh me, oh my. If Mole ever shows up around here again, I’ll give him a piece of my mind. I will; I will.” 

When Mole got to the foot of the oak tree, he looked up, cupped his hands around his mouth, and called out: “Squi—rrrrel. It’s Mo—oooooole.”

Mole had to call out several times before Squirrel heard because he was fussing so. When he did hear, Squirrel said:

“Ah! Ah! Ah! There he is. Just wait. Just wait. Am I gonna give him a piece of my mind! Making me wait and worry like this. Just wait. Just wait. Ah! Ah! Ah!”

And he said this all the way down the tree. And he meant it. But when he got to the ground and was close enough to start his harangue, he could see the worried, sorrowful look on Mole’s face and he could not fuss. He could not. 

“Hi, Mole. Merry Christmas! Good night for a walk.” 

“Gee, Squirrel. I’m sorry. Sorry I’m so late. I was at Fox’s and I almost forgot.”

“No problem. No problem. Just in time. Besides a little anticipation is appropriate at Christmas. Right? Right. Now, let’s go get the gifts. Lots to do. Lots to do. Get your key out. You do have your key, right? Your door is locked. I tried it. Just to make sure your things were safe, you know. They are. Very safe. Very secure. Let’s go. Lots to do. Lots to do.”

You’ve seen it before. No one can be really angry at Mole—at least not for long. And even before they had made their way to Mole’s door, Squirrel had quite forgotten his anxiety and anger. Animals are good at not carrying around their angry stuff. We should be so wise. 

When all the gifts were placed at the foot of the oak so that Squirrel could take them up the tree (Mole couldn’t help him with that task. Moles are diggers, not climbers), Mole asked Squirrel if he were going to Antioch. 

“No. No. No. Too many young ones. Maybe next year. If you are going, better get started. A long walk. A cold night.”

“Yes. But at least the wind is dying down. Merry Christmas to you and your family.”

“Merry Christmas to you too, Mole. And thanks again for your help.” (Did you notice? Squirrel actually slowed down to make sure that Mole heard.)

Mole was lucky. The wind had died down so Mole’s walk back to Fox’s was not that bad. It was cold, but still and the sky was moonless and filled with stars. He was walking fast, but stopped a couple of times to catch his breath and look at the stars. Once when he was about half way down the hill to Thompson’s creek and within a half a mile of Fox’s house and thus quite sure that he would make it back in time for Antioch, Mole stopped and looked up for a long time. Then he began to turn slowly so he could take in all the stars and their patterns. The effect was, Mole thought, wonderful. The stars seemed to take on a movement of their own and to spin in patterns that didn’t match his movement. He began to feel that he was still and the starts were moving. Around and around he turned uttering little “ooooohs” and forgetting completely that he was turning until his body told him he was dizzy and he almost fell down. 

Just as Mole started his little circular dance, a rabbit out foraging for last minute tidbits for his Christmas table came to the edge of the road. He stopped and watched the whole thing and didn’t move until Mole had walked a ways down the road. (Though for the first ten or fifteen yards, it was more wobble than walk. Mole was quite dizzy.) The rabbit moved away shaking his head, snickering, and muttering to himself: “I’ve been down a lot of rabbit holes, but I’ve never seen anything quite like that.”

Within fifteen minutes, Mole was down the hole under the big hickory root—the hole that lead to Fox’s place. He opened the door, quickly closing it behind him so not much cold air would spill in. When he turned back toward the room, he saw Fox sitting in his big overstuffed chair reading a book. Pup was standing (a bit impatiently, Mole thought) with his back to the fire—the warm fire Mole had to leave hours ago when he started his journey. 

“Ah, Mole. Welcome back,” said Fox. “Pup here was wondering if you would get back in time to go to Antioch. I told him that you would for sure and that it would take about fifteen minutes longer. And how long ago was that Pup?” 

“Fifteen minutes. Are you always right, Fox?”

“Not often enough, Pup. Not often enough. Warm your hands and face a bit, Mole, and then we’d best be going.”

Pup chimed in with: “and why don’t you have some hot tea. It wouldn’t take a minute to heat the water on the fire.”

“Oh, thank you, Pup. But that would never do. Not right before going to Antioch.” 

“What is it with this Antioch anyway? You two have not let me eat or drink anything but cold water since breakfast. Why? It doesn’t make sense.”

Fox just smiled and said, “You’ll see. You’ll see.” And as soon as Mole had warmed his hands at the fire, Fox banked the coals and they bundled up and headed out into the cold, clear Christmas Eve air. 

They walked to the road, turned right, crossed Thompson Creek, and started climbing the hill. As soon as they were on the road and could walk side by side, Pup started in again: “What is this Antioch? Why are we going there so late on Christmas Eve? Why wouldn’t you let me eat today? I don’t understand. You two are usually such reasonable creatures.”

Fox grew tired of the questions before they were halfway up the hill. He finally responded, using that firm, authoritatiCopyright 2007, William Riversve voice he uses when he grows impatient: “Pup, you will see when we get there. Our tradition is not to talk on the way there or the way back. You will understand it all on your own. Be patient.” And then Fox patted Pup on the shoulder. 

The pat told Pup that Fox still liked him. Fox’s tone told Pup that he should not say anything else. He didn’t. He wanted to, but he didn’t. 

Just before they got to the top of the hill they turned left onto a dirt road that soon took them into a deeply forested area. The trees were close on either side of the road—so close that Pup could see only the stars that were directly overhead. The darkness made him a bit uneasy. He wanted to say something then. But he didn’t. He did walk closer to Fox, though. 

Then they cam to another road and turned right onto it. The woods seemed even deeper and darker. Pup wanted even more to say something. But he didn’t’. He did move even closer to Fox. He noticed that Mole seemed closer to him on the other side. 

As they continued to walk on this road, the darkness grew; the trees almost seemed to meet over their heads. Then after a mile or so on this road Pup could see a bit of a break in the trees on the right. As they got closer he could see that it was a definite opening in the woods and he could see stars closer to the horizon over the tree line. But the extra light enabled Pup to see what was in the clearing. Pup stopped. He did not want to go any further—especially when he felt that Fox and Mole were turning to walk in that direction.

What Pup saw disturbed him. On the right side of that opening in the woods, he saw a dark old building—an old church. Even in the dim starlight, Pup could see that the church was deserted and had broken windows and missing boards. The boards were all dark and didn’t seem to have ever been painted. All that dark wood almost made the church blend in with the darkness of the woods. But the structure was large enough and visible enough that it loomed in the night’s darkness, its high and pointed roofline clearly visible against the sky making what seemed an unnatural and forbidding statement in the dark, but natural landscape. And behind the church and to the left, Pup could see tombstones in a cemetery, their irregular shapes in stone and marble slightly more visible in the starlight. 

No, no. Pup did not want to go any further. Then Pup felt Fox’s paw on his right side and Mole’s on his left and felt them, without words, urge him on. His trust of Fox and Mole was stronger than his fear and he moved with them. But he stayed very, very close. 

They walked to the right front of the church past the front door and its missing front steps to a place on the side of the church where missing and broken boards offered an opening. Fox climbed through the hole into the church; Pup and Mole followed. 

Once they were inside the church it took even Pup’s sharp animal eyes a moment to adjust to the darkness. But when they did he was amazed. For what he saw was that the church was filled with animals—animals of all kinds. Animals who at other times during the years were enemies were right there standing side by side without fear or worry. He saw mice and raccoons and opossums and porcupines and skunks and rabbits and a couple of beavers and squirrels and several other foxes and moles. He saw animals he had never seen before, but could guess from their shapes and sizes and equipment whether they were diggers or stalkers or foragers. He saw tow large cat-like creatures that he guessed were bobcats, animals he had only hear, screaming in the night. On the exposed rafters overhead he saw all kinds of birds: cardinals, sparrows, wrens, jays, but also, on the same perches, larger birds of prey—owls and hawks. And as he was looking up, he saw a very large bird, one he took to be an eagle, fly in through an opening at the end of the church and alight on a rafter next to several doves who moved over, not out of fear, but to make more room. On other lower perches he even saw game chickens and a few wild turkeys. And as he looked about the large room, Pup saw several deer thrust their heads through broken windows. 

Pup was surprised because though he was still cold, he felt no fear. He did wonder mightily at what he was seeing. They all waited, quietly, in stillness for a while, and then, just at twelve, just at the end of Christmas Even and the beginning of Christmas Day, Pup noticed that the church seemed to fill with a soft glow. And then he began to feel around him a special warmth and within him a sweet fullness – a warmth and sweetness that he had never felt before. He glanced up and all the other animals had bowed their heads. He did too. 

Then, after a few minutes, the glow faded and the animals quietly and slowly began to move out of the church to return to their nests and burrows. As they left, they greeted each other silently with nods and smiles. 

Fox, Mole, and Pup returned to Fox’s home in silence, the warmth and fullness still with them. They did not feel the cold. They slept warm and snug all that night and all Christmas Day they did not eat and did not feel hunger because of the sweet and peaceful fullness that lasted. Pup now knew about Antioch, but he also knew that it was not just something that happened at Antioch. That special thing happened wherever the animals gathered on Christmas Eve and sought communion and peace. 

Early in the morning on the day after Christmas Day Fox, Mole and Pup started preparing the meal they enjoyed that evening. They had corn and beans and sweet potatoes fixed in a souffle and several casseroles made with squash and cheese and onions and all kinds of breads and sweet muffins and hot apple juice spiced with cinnamon and, man, I get hungry just thinking about it all. After they had eaten (and cleaned up, they are neat creatures), they exchanged gifts. Mole got a muffler (one that he wished he had had on Christmas Eve) and a case for his glasses so they wouldn’t get scratched while he wasn’t wearing them (like when he was digging). Pup got a cap and a hot water bottle to put on his leg when it ached because of changes in the weather. Pup and Mole went together to get Fox a book he had long wanted for his collection –a history of Baroque and Classical music. For the next several days they ate and talked and enjoyed each other’s company (though Fox did spend a lot of time reading and humming over his new book, as we knew he would). 

Several days later Mole left to return to his house. Fox and Pup tried to convince him to stay, but Mole had other things on his mind: “I really enjoy being with you, especially at Christmas. Our times together make me stronger all through the year, especially when I am alone. But now it is time for me to return home to my place and my work. I really need to start a new tunnel tomorrow.” 

Fox worried at this because he knew that new tunnels were often dangerous and he knew that Mole had experienced several close calls in the bast. But he only admonished Mole to be careful. Danger, he knew, was a part of life for the animals. 

So they parted happily and Mole walked back to his snug home near Mt. Croghan. He thought of his friends as he fell asleep and dreamed that night of digging a long, wonderfully successful tunnel. 

And despite a few big rocks that he had to work around, the digging went well for Mole the next day—and for many days after that. 

THE END



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